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At this point, people know a little something about my life’s story–the ups the downs, the tragedy and triumph of living in my skin for the past 25 years. And the cool parts, the crap I talk about at cocktail parties, are the successes. But the parts I don’t exactly scream from every rooftop are the not-so-cool details about life in prison.
I wish I hadn’t needed to go through the incredible pain of that time in my life, but I did. I needed my eyes opened. I, like every human being ever created, needed to have a “realignment” to point me in a more fulfilling direction. You know the Ying and Yang of my life’s story. I always hoped it would have a hell of lot more Ying, but here we are anyway.
Being locked up: the path to gratitude.
While I was behind bars, I lost my father to cancer, one of my children was put up for adoption and I watched through smudged, bullet-proof glass in a series of heartbreaking visitations my six-year-old son grow to be thirteen. I lost people and moments and dignity and life (fo’sho), but I gained important things that completely changed the trajectory of my life.
And having it all stripped away in such an abrupt and complete manner provided me the insight to finally appreciate what a vast majority of people spend their entire lives taking for granted. Overnight, my eyes were opened, whether I asked for it or not.
Clichés for days.
Now, I’m not one of those people who bandies around clichés like the screenwriters for Disney (God, I love those movies), so relax. But I do want to drop a nugget that I believe is extremely relevant to the current state of the world.
The greatest gift I have ever received is the deep understanding that nothing lasts forever. Spoiler alert: this is not bullshit. Look, in spite of what a lot of us might think, nobody is entitled to a good life or happiness or even freedom for that matter. Nobody. And when you come to the conclusion that it will all pass someday–not that it can pass but will pass–you naturally appreciate life’s precious moments a hell of a lot more.
In my life, in my travels, I have grown to learn that gratitude is directly proportional to the degree to which you realize how much you will miss something when it is gone.
What’s this got to do with you?
Now, let’s talk about this COVID-19 quarantine crap. I mean, it seems to be all anyone is talking about so what’s one more schmuck pontificating about how it’s all a blessing in disguise? Buuut… this lockdown really is a blessing in disguise. There, I said it.
I get that we are scared. I get that the country is shutting down and people are losing jobs and some are even losing their lives and for the time being, we have no idea when or where this ends. I don’t want to minimize the fear and uncertainty, whatsoever. But I do want to draw attention to the deeper awakening this experience will cause for many people.
Something to look forward to.
Soon enough, we will see that life and freedom are fragile and beautiful and not guaranteed. Soon enough, we will appreciate the relationships and the simple things we overlooked and maybe, just maybe, we’ll stop drawing lines in the sand over petty things that don’t amount to a hill of beans.
This is precisely the swift kick in the pants that will lovingly change our perspective, shift our awareness and expand the collective consciousness to something resembling goodness. A thing worth bragging about.
People are going to wake up to the false pretense that the world owes them a better life and start seeing the beauty in the here and now. This is where we all discover that nothing lasts forever. Not life, not health, not happiness, not freedom. And definitely not the beautiful people that have been placed in our lives.
So get it while the gettin’s good, homie. Open your eyes to what you have and stop all the bullshit whining about what you don’t have.
A world after lockdown.
Take it from a person who has been locked down in a way most people will never experience. You will see this quarantine as a blessing. Because your appreciation for the simple things are all going to mean something again. A passing conversation with a stranger, a mediocre dinner in a too-noisy restaurant or a crowded beach on an overcast day will soon become one of the most beautiful experiences of your life.
Mark my word.
And when it does, bow your head once again and give thanks to something greater than yourself for the perspective that you’ve gained from the fear, the concern, the boredom brought on by COVID-19.